There’s this thing about life. Sometimes it’s overwhelming, sometimes underwhelming. Either way, you just keep going because there’s nothing else to do. When I was younger, a teenager, I used to dream about stopping. I was never a happy teenager. I remember this feeling, these dreams, of just quitting, giving up. I wasn’t suicidal – just fed up – and stopping didn’t mean stopping life, just stopping the constant going on. But how was this to be done? I didn’t know then, but I think I know now. It’s not so much about giving up, it’s rather about giving in.

These days a lot of people talk about mindfulness and I guess this term is as close as it gets. By giving in to what is, to the moment you’re in, the life you live, the circumstances, you obtain peace of mind. And through this peace of mind you’ll find happiness and change.

I’m not the one to talk since I’m actually quite bad at living in the moment and giving in. I’m a planner – big time – always ten steps ahead of myself and life – planning out what I want, need, how it will be, and last but not least how it should be.

I’m a grand should-be’er!

If only this and that, I tell myself, then this and that would be better. I guess my teenage self was quite the same. Way ahead of herself in some distant dream future …

Wow, to think all these years didn’t change that.

However, I know how that giving in is much better. This is how it is now, and if I want to make changes, I begin here by being in this now and making changes now for what I want to happen.
And I have quite a nice ideas as to what I want for my future – I’m a planner, remember – but I’ll stay here and now and make the change.
To distant dreams!

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